A window into my life changing decisions, and all the highs and lows they brought with them. This is just as much my story, as it is yours.

The first Monday morning after having quit on the comforts of a 9 to 5 lifestyle, I tossed around uneasily in bed. No, I did not regret moving on from life as a full-time architect, yet I lay confused and upset, unsure of why. It was between awkward turns and attempts to soothe myself that I realized, this morning was the first in all my life when no external routine or expectations were projected onto me! I did not have somewhere to be or something to get done; the day lay before me like an empty canvas- an indulgence I had never been afforded, from the first day of school to the last day of architectural practice!

Even holidays came with their set of do-s and don’t-s. Yet here I lay unsure of what to rise to and what to reach out for; this moment was utterly empty. And yes, that did send my mind and ego into an absolute flurry, for never before was a Monday morning so open-ended, so malleable…so free.

With nothing to occupy it in the here and now, my mind raced into the past and into the future; I moved between doubt and regret as parts of me struggled to make sense of this entirely new experience- 100% pure and unadulterated choice.

There were no shoulders to cry on or opinions to validate my own this morning; all I had was the faint sound of my inner voice. Instead this morning, I was faced with a calling to be, live and act in complete alignment with my self- my dreams, desires and intentions. The risks were mine as were the results, for this morning was the first day of a new life I had embarked on- a life of authenticity and choices rendered in it.

Over the coming weeks and months, I had many awkward mornings and revelations that followed. I learnt to unlearn the instruction manuals I had gorged on since early childhood. Bit by bit my own voice became stronger bolder and more forthcoming. I learnt anew about all aspects of my life- relationships, money, the extraordinary and the mundane, all in the emptiness of moments.

No, it wasn’t a joy ride; unlearning is a lot harder than learning is- your mind struggles to defend its beliefs as your ego refuses to make space for the contrary. But as the two swam in uncharted waters, I re-discovered a more natural and mindful way of being- one that guided me from one moment to another, one day to the next.

From change to challenge, it was only by listening and paying attention that I found answers. In the silence of empty moments, newer intricacies- that were earlier drowned out by instruction, expectation and routine- became apparent. I learnt to read the rhythms of my own heart and voice, understand the plans and play of my own mind, reining them all in to work together in mutual harmony. It was by being mindful that, in the emptiness of moments, I ceased to struggle with myself & allowed her to truly come forth. It was by being mindful that I learnt to enjoy choice & walk the path of free-will in grace.

In truth, when it comes to making sweeping changes to our way of life, it isn’t the decision that is the hardest bit. That is a moment invigorated by a deep calling and a synergy with our own Truth. It is the execution of these changes- switching from one mode to another- that is the testing ground of our courage, conviction and confidence. Submitting to the pace and passage of time, we are called to stand steady in the face of daunting mental and emotional onslaughts- within and without. In these trials it is the wisdom of mindful living that carries us forth; here are a few pointers I picked up along the way.

Anchor Within. In times of change, all around us may be falling apart, or yet gestating hidden from our eyes and awareness. Unlike the comfort of routine, this time may not offer much in terms of external validation or visible anchors for your beliefs, thoughts, ideas and choices. You need to anchor within- anchor in your faith, beliefs and ideas; give yourself a chance as you watch things around you come together afresh.

Don’t Rush to Replace One Routine with Another! If you are looking to break free of the mundane and the predictable you might get up and leave your job, but what you really need to leave behind is the false comfort of routine. That is not to say routine per se is bad, but one adopted without thought for or coherence with your rhythms, or the changes you are undergoing, can be quite counterproductive.

Befriend the Void. The greatest learning this move offers is a chance to renegotiate your relationship with uncertainty and surrender- with ‘not knowing’. We love to live and act like we have all the answers, and sooner or later life stumps us with a curved ball. Instead, if we acknowledge the play of the opposites in our life- of knowledge and mystery- we can move in greater tandem with universal forces.

Learn to look into the void- its mystery and the multitude of scenarios it offers; this is a rich ground for learning and self-mastery. Learn to just be. That doesn’t mean you spend all day meditating- without realizing you may be setting yourself up just another routine of ‘doing’ for yourself! Learning to be is a call to living in the moment, allowing it to take shape as and when the moment arrives. This is critical to master the unpredictability of this time as well as the empty moments it presents.

Don’t run away from doubts. the more you resist, the more these persist. When changing your way of living, you are also called upon to change the way you relate and respond to doubt. Sit your doubts down, have a pleasant conversation- they may not co-operate at first, but if you stay calm and steady, they are sure to fall in line.

Get Creative. A change of life is an opportunity to rediscover you. Try something new- a class, a hobby or an activity to get your creative juices flowing. Remember, just because you weren’t great at something when you were younger, does not mean you can’t ace it now — you are no longer the same person! As you reformat your life, don’t forget to reinvent yourself as well as your expectations of you.

Be Patient. There is no wisdom like the wisdom of time. Whether you like it or not, everything- from plants and life to your projects- takes its requisite time to come into form and manifestation. Allow things to come together in their own pace; not yours. Stay actively involved, standing as an unmoving beacon of belief and hope while things evolve. But don’t rush the process- there is joy and there is learning in every phase!